As the High Holidays near, we joyously welcome our new rabbi, Matthew Kaufman, to KI.  Rabbi Kaufman brings a wealth of experience, both congregational and scholarly, to his role with us, along with deep knowledge of Kehillat Israel and its culture, having grown up and become bar mitzvah here.

Although the current pandemic means we must hold services online during the Days of Awe, Rabbi Kaufman is making plans for in-person (but physically distanced) activities that will allow face-to-face time with congregants—including tashlich on the first second of Rosh Hashana and small-group gatherings in KI members’ yards and other outdoor spaces.
Members will be hearing more about that soon, and non-members can get more information by emailing KIKatherineB@gmail.com. But for now, we welcome Rabbi Kaufman!

This weeks zoom events for Wednesday and Saturday services!

Wednesday, July 29th, 7pm: Tisha B’Av Service
Join us for a brief ma’ariv service followed by a discussion led by Nicole Ellefson of Lamentations and Jewish resilience.
Congregation Kehillat Israel is inviting you to a scheduled Zoom meeting.
Topic: Tisha B’Av
Time: Jul 29, 2020 07:00 PM Eastern Time (US and Canada)
Join Zoom Meeting
Meeting ID: 819 3358 7724
Passcode: kehillat
One tap mobile
+13017158592,,81933587724#,,,,,,0#,,84077177# US (Germantown)
+13126266799,,81933587724#,,,,,,0#,,84077177# US (Chicago)
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        +1 301 715 8592 US (Germantown)
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        +1 253 215 8782 US (Tacoma)
        +1 346 248 7799 US (Houston)
        +1 669 900 6833 US (San Jose)
Meeting ID: 819 3358 7724
Passcode: 84077177
Find your local number: https://us02web.zoom.us/u/kbhyRrHgox
 
Saturday, August 1st, 10am: Shabbat Services — Parashat Va’etchanan (Kol HaNeshamah)
Congregation Kehillat Israel is inviting you to a scheduled Zoom meeting.
Topic: Congregation Kehillat Israel Shabbat Service
Time: This is a recurring meeting Meet anytime
Join Zoom Meeting
Meeting ID: 884 2708 4432
Passcode: kehillat
One tap mobile
+13126266799,,88427084432#,,,,,,0#,,162282# US (Chicago)
+19292056099,,88427084432#,,,,,,0#,,162282# US (New York)
Dial by your location
        +1 312 626 6799 US (Chicago)
        +1 929 205 6099 US (New York)
        +1 301 715 8592 US (Germantown)
        +1 346 248 7799 US (Houston)
        +1 669 900 6833 US (San Jose)
        +1 253 215 8782 US (Tacoma)
Meeting ID: 884 2708 4432
Passcode: 162282
Find your local number: https://us02web.zoom.us/u/kbdqnj3qz

A note from Rabbi Zimmerman

Dear KI members,

Even though it has taken me this long to get back to you, I can’t begin to tell you how touched and grateful I am for the warmth of the celebration and “parade” June 6-7. Elischa and I were deeply moved by all your kind words. And the masks, the Amazon gift certificate, and the mezuzah are all deeply appreciated and will remind us of our dear friends at KI as we travel and then get settled in our new home.

These are very strange and challenging times, and I regret leaving you having to still contend with online services and activities for the foreseeable future. Fortunately we developed ample experience since March in sustaining Jewish community life even on the Zoom platform, so I am confident that you will continue to flourish. I am also grateful to leave KI in Matthew Kaufman’s capable hands. You and we have prepared hard for this transition, and I believe the benefits will continue to pay off in the years to come.

I wish you all the best of health, the strength and patience to persevere in difficult situations, and the continued joy of KI community life now and in the future.

B’Shalom,

Michael
Rabbi Michael Zimmerman

Tikkun Olam

The Tikkun Olam committee will be meeting via Zoom on Tuesday, July 7 at 5:30 pm to discuss priorities and planning for the current year.   There has been a lot of change to our world since we last met, and we welcome anyone who is interested in talking about the kinds of programming and actions we can take in response to those changes.

Zoom information will be made available the week of the meeting by RSVPing to fermagli@msu.edu

10 Yiddish Words to Get You Through This Quarantine

Mitch Perliss
Visual Storyteller · 2 hrs
10 Yiddish Words to Get You Through This Quarantine

1We’ve been self-quarantining for 40-plus days and, quite frankly, we’re running out of steam. Here’s some helpful Yiddish vocabulary to help describe our current situation….
1. Tsedrayte
adj. (tsuh-DRATE) All mixed up, confused.
Before the Covid-19 virus, tsedrayte meant we couldn’t remember if we promised to meet a friend for lunch on Thursday or Friday. Now we don’t know what day of the week it is. These days, just getting the mail makes us tsedrayte. Do we leave the letters on the floor for 24 hours? Do we wipe the package before we put it on the floor or wash our hands and then wipe the package? And what do we do after we open it?
2. Shpilkes
(SHPILL-kiss) Impatience, restlessness.
Before Covid-19, when our young kids had “ants in their pants,” we’d tell them to go outside and play. Now, however, we have to mask them up first, and watch them carefully so they stay six feet away from all the other kids who are also trying to get their shpilkes out. We used to go out to a yoga class; now when our little ones have shpilkes, we watch Cosmic Kids Yoga and do downward facing dogs right along with them.
3. Shlub
n. (SHLUB) A slob; some who dresses sloppily.
All this self-quarantining has made shlubs even shlubbier. Sweatpants and torn T-shirts have gone from weekend wear to all day, everyday wear — unless you’re one of those people who dons business casual from the waist up for your Zoom conference calls. If we’ve learned any fashion sense while being self-quarantined, it’s that a bra is optional.
4. Pulkes
pl. n. (PULL-keys) Thighs.
The word usually refers to cute, chubby baby thighs, but it can also mean those belonging to poultry. And with all the freezer diving we’re doing, we’ve discovered and eaten our fair share of pulkes in the last month. We’re counting the days till we can swap out our sweatpants for shorts and attend a summer barbecue, but we’re not certain our pulkes will be ready for public viewing after all we’ve eaten.
5. Sekhel
n. (SEH-khul) Common sense; good judgment.
Advice used to flow downstream. Our parents would nag us: “Have a little sekhel; do you really have to fly when you’re pregnant?” Now the tables have turned and we nag our parents: “Wash your hands. Wear a mask. You’re going to the supermarket? You’re old. Stay home!” And our kids? They have the computer sekhel we need: They’ve taught us how to complete the online school attendance form and how to limit our Facebook posts to “friends only” so we don’t embarrass them in front of “the whole world!” They’ve also taught us that there’s nothing wrong with eating ice cream twice a day.
6. Eyngeshparter
n. (AYN-guh-shpar-ter) A stubborn person; someone who cannot be convinced with logic.
These are the people who are protesting to end the shutdown before it’s safe, ordering “cures” on the Internet, and claiming the pandemic is all a hoax.
7. Bubkes
n. (BUP-kiss) Literally beans, nothing.
Something that’s worthless or that falls short of expectations. In this new normal, we’re getting used to bubkes in the toilet paper aisle, bubkes in our fresh vegetable drawer, and bubkes in our checking account.
8. Ongeblozen
adj. (un-geh-BLUH-zin) Sulky, pouty; a sourpuss.
Our kids used to get ongeblozzen when we said we couldn’t go out for pizza. Now everyone’s ongeblozzen because we spent all afternoon making dough from scratch… and we didn’t have the right kind of cheese. “It tastes funny. It doesn’t taste like Panzone’s pizza. Why can’t we go to Panzone’s?”
9. Tsuris
n. (TSORE-iss) troubles and worries; problems.
We can’t help worrying when our sister tells us she had a suspicious mammogram or our son hints that someone bullied him in school. But these days, instead of worrying about illness or money or school or our family or the future — we’re worried about all of it. Tsuris has gone from personal to universal.
10. Oy
int. (OY)
Perhaps the most popular Yiddish expression, oy conveys dozens of emotions, from surprise, joy, and relief to pain, fear and grief. Bubbe Mitzi used to say that just groaning “a good oy” could make you feel better. So give a good oy, tie the shmata on your face — be sure to cover your mouth and your nose!